Show And Tell
by kakashidiot
Summary: It's show and tell. Shino is up. And he's creepy. Can the class stick it? CRACKTASTIC! RandR! Some shounen ai.
1. Prologue

**I don't own Naruto…. Perhaps that's a good thing…..**

**Basically, burning more time trying to forget how fricked up my academic future may be.**

**Don't take this seriously - so no extreme flames- but I encourage encouragement!**

**

* * *

**

Show and Tell

**Prologue**

For a month, Konoha's Ramen shop was in the dumps. Iruka had disappeared off the face of the earth, seemingly, resulting in a large decline in ramen sales.

Although Naruto remained a faithful customer, Iruka was pointedly missing – no longer did he stop there everyday for lunch (where else did Naruto get his habit?) – no longer did he treat anybody else out.

Why?

Was he dead?

Was he burnt out in his apartment?

Was he dead in his apartment due to burn out and being eaten by wild dogs?

Was he broke?

Simply put, Iruka had been chosen as the top teacher to go to the Far East, to the land of the Westerners, for an international teacher's conference. It was two weeks of educational goodness – just the thing Iruka dreamed of.

And so, the journey itself taking a week, two weeks conference and then another week spent coming back, Iruka was gone for a month.

Every Jounin who had to fill in for Iruka, breathed a sigh of relief as he crossed the threshold of their village. The brown-haired Chuunin was surprised when he saw so many people waiting for him with welcoming faces.

Even Kakashi had smiled and said more than hello.

Iruka smiled dumbfounded at Kakashi's enthusiastic, "I'm glad to see you back safely!"

Looking at the Academy teacher, the Rookie Nine shook their heads.

"He's got that LOOK," Sakura sighed.

"It's the same look he had when he found that manual on camouflage," Kiba sighed.

"And worse, the shinobi don't realize it…" Shino shrugged.

"Really?" asked Naruto. "I don't see anything different about him…. Tell me? What's different?"

"It's too troublesome to explain to you," Shikamaru turned away dismissively.

"What an idiot," Chouji said. "I wonder what is up Iruka-sensei's sleeve?"

"Well, whatever it is, doesn't affect us." Ino smiled.

"Yeah, yeah, we're Genin now!" Naruto grinned. "So no fear, right?"

Sasuke snorted.

Inwardly he heaved a sigh of relief at the reminder. Whenever Iruka had that flaming teacher look, it meant that he was going to get serious. Which is scary in somebody like Kakashi or the Hokage, but shitting scary in somebody like Iruka or Gai.

Famous last thoughts…..


	2. Iruka's New Idea

I don't own Naruto…. Probably just as well….

**

* * *

**

Show and Tell

**Iruka's New Idea**

Gathering a large number of the shinobi together, Iruka had divided the village into groups. This was the first group.

"Okay! Roll-call!"

"Asumo."

"Yo!"

"Anko."

"YA!"

Iruka winced. Everybody winced.

"Chouji."

"chompchompchompherechompchompchomp."

"Obviously here," Iruka sighed at the sound of the continual crackling of chip bags.

"Ebisu."

"Here."

"Gai."

"HERE!" Gai posed, causing EVERYBODY to cringe. His flashing teeth blinded even Tsunade.

"Somebody, take away his toothpaste," she grumbled.

She had no desire to be there, but part of the whole kage business was setting a good example.

"Genma."

"Tch."

"Hinata."

"h-h-h-here…."

"Eh?" asked Iruka, not seeing Hinata since she was sitting behind Asumo. "Did I hear something?"

"She's here, Iruka," Kurenai said, seeing that Hinata was fainting from embarrassment.

"Ooookay….Ibiki."

Ibiki grunted. Iruka looked at his scary face and didn't press the issue. Whenever that guy entered a room, a black cloud came with him…. Iruka was still nervous around him after his Chuunin Exam…

'Ino.'

"Pre-sent, I-ruka-sen-sei!" Ino smiled and waved at her teacher.

Iruka grinned back.

"Izumo."

"Here."

"Jiraiya."

"Yo! Children! Open your peepers! The Toad-Sannin is HERE!"

"Shut up, Jiraiya, you're slowing us down," Tsunade growled, whacking the Sannin as he clog-danced on the desk. "If you don't stop it this minute, I'll charge you for the damage done to the desks."

Jiraiya stopped immediately.

"His entrance was even better than mine," fumed Gai.

"Kakashi."

Silence.

"Kakashi?"

Silence.

"He's always late!" Sakura said.

"I thought I saw him…" murmured Jiraiya.

"I told you to drag him in here on time," gritted Tsunade, glaring at Jiraiya.

Hinata squeaked.

Everybody turned to look back – for sure, Kakashi was there… on time – but obviously out to lunch since his nose was buried deeply in his perennial romance.

Iruka's eye twitched and in two bounds, landed on the large desk before Kakashi, causing the Jounin to look up slowly.

"Ehhhh? What do we have here? Reading while I'm talking!" Iruka was going a warm red. "Hand it over."

"What?" asked Kakashi, wondering who was pulling a prank on him. This could not be the Iruka he knew.

"You heard me. Hand. It. Over."

Kakashi instinctively gripped his book tighter.

"Are you Iruka-sensei?"

"Of course I'm IRUKA-SENSEI AND I'M TELLING YOU TO GIVE ME THE BOOK!"

"Do what he says, Kakashi," Tsunade glared at the silver-haired Jounin. "He'll give it back to you at the end of class."

Iruka nodded.

_What did they do to Iruka-sensei in the west?_ Wondered Kakashi as he slipped the book oh so reluctantly into the chuunin's hand. _Did they brainwash him?_

"By the way, Iruka," the Jounin's grey eye turned hard and deadly. His hand pressed Iruka's wrist hard onto the desk. "Anything happen to that, and you're D.E.A.D. Got it?"

Iruka sweatdropped as extreme death threatening feelings swamped him.

He nodded and backed away.

Back at the relatively safety of his desk, Iruka dropped the book distastefully into his drawer and locked it.

"It's not like I'd want anybody else to get a taste for those anyway. Now… back to the roll call…. Kiba."

"Here."

"Yip! Yip!"

"He can have his dog and I can't have my book?" Grumbled Kakashi.

Hinata sighed.

"He-he-he never goes anywhere…. Without…. Akamaru…."

"I never go anywhere without my romances."

Hinata didn't reply. The fact that the famous Copy Ninja spoke to her, stunned her enough.

"Kotetsu."

"Hey."

"Kurenai."

"Here… hehehe…"

"Eh?"

"Nothing, nothing."

She glared at Asumo who was playing footsie with her.

"If you guys don't stop that, you two will be separated." Iruka wagged his finger.

Kurenai and Asumo looked stricken.

_Asumo: What the heck! He's like the teacher from HELL!_

_Kurenai: And I thought MY teacher was bad! No wonder the Rookie Nine are so intelligent and messed up!_

"Lee."

"YOSH! BRING IT ON!"

Iruka winced. Everybody else winced, except for Gai who gave his student a thumbs up.

"Naruto."

"I'M HERE! EVERYBODY GET A LOOK AT THE FUTURE HOKAGE!"

Everybody banged their heads on the desks.

"Neji."

"Humph."

"Raido."

"Heeerreeeee….zzzzz….."

Genma whacked him on the head.

"Sakura."

"Present, Iruka-sensei!"

"Sasuke."

"Here."

"Shikamaru."

Chouji nudged him.

"zzzzzzzz…….. eh? What? Oh…. Uh… here… I guess… man! This is too troublesome!"

Iruka looked put out.

"Shino."

"Present."

"Shizune."

"Here, babes." She winked at him and he blushed red as he checked her name off.

"Tenten."

"About time, here."

"Tsunade."

"I agree with you… move it along…."

"Right, well, at the conference they spent a whole day on presentation skills and how in the West, classrooms for young kids always spend some time doing 'Show and Tell' and I realized that Konoha could really use this – for young and old trainees and for the shinobi as well – since it would enhance our skills in presentation."

"Presentation?" asked Naruto. "What's that?"

Everybody rolled their eyes.

But they were also glad somebody was stupid enough to ask.

"Well, it brought to mind that horrible presentation Asumo did awhile back on Sound-nin movement. It was so badly done, too much time was spent asking questions to get things straight…."

Everybody turned and glared at Asumo.

It was the smoker's fault.

Asumo shrugged.

"Sooo…. Asumo. Put out that cigarette, there's not supposed to be any smoking within school grounds. Except in designated smoking areas. Anyway, what was I saying?"  
"Asumo's bad presentation," prompted Sakura, helpfully.

"That's right. So. I thought, I'd give you all a chance to do show and tell, allowing me to be able to ascertain how well-developed your presentation skills are."

"This is soooo dumb," grumbled Naruto. "Does he honestly think we're going to beat Sound with this boring crap?"

"It'll send them to sleep," Kiba drawled.

Sasuke silently agreed.

_What a waste of time,_ he thought. _I should be practicing the chidori and expanding my chakra – not wasting it with this dumb show-and-tell shit._

Iruka gave everybody a death glare.

Everybody's murmuring silenced.

"I'm going to be handing out two sheets per person, which you will complete here. It will only take an hour or so…. It basically will help you get an idea of what to do and will help you decide what steps you should take for the perfect presentation. I've put on it all the things I will be looking for – and what each thing is worth…. I've given you two – one for me and one for yourself, to aid you in your progress….Ummm… Sakura, Ino, can you help me hand them out?"

The girls cheerfully handed out the white sheets and accompanying pens.

Kakashi with a jaundiced eye stared at the white sheets.

**SHOW AND TELL**

**Name:**

**Topic:**

**WHAT I NEED:**

**WHAT I NEED TO DO:**

**Presentation:**

**Topic Choice:………………………………../20**

**Artistry:…………………………………….../10**

**Clearness:……………………………………/10**

**Well-researched:……………………………./10**

**Speaker's Knowledge:………………………/10**

**Interesting:…………………………………../10**

**Display:……………………………………../10**

**Conciseness:……………………………….../10**

**Originality:…………………………………./10**

**TOTAL /100**

"You can begin now…." Iruka said. He stepped back, seated himself in his chair and started to mark some papers.

Kakashi noticed he 'x'ed more things than checked.

_Geez! This man is a monster! It's a good thing he never hooked up with Orochimaru…._

Everybody finally picked up their pens and started to write. Some looked excited. Some looked blasé. Some looked resigned. And a few had wicked grins on their faces.

Kakashi smirked. So the man took away his book. Well. He was damned if he was going to lift a finger.

Kakashi spent the rest of the session doodling and drawing pictures of Yukie Fujikaze as the heroine of Makeout Paradise on the back of his papers.

Hinata made the mistake of glancing to her left. She blushed as she watched a scantily clad female being sketched out on the white prep sheet. Suddenly, she focused on her sheet and sighed.

_What WAS she going to do? And could she even go up front and do something like that? Sure, she said she was going to change and never give up – but did that mean she would have the courage to do such a big thing as a presentation?_

"RAIDO! I caught that! Give it to me!"

Hinata jumped, startled and gave a squeak.

Kakashi gazed around slowly, landing his eyes on the Hyuuga heir.

_What a bundle of nerves she is! And I thought Sakura's whiny weakness was bad!_

_How does Kurenai cope? Well… she does have Asumo…._

He turned his eye on the melodrama a few rows down and a section to the right.

Iruka was waving a note triumphantly.

_Shit. Iruka. Don't. Read. It. There's something's in life you are NOT prepared for, mini monster though you be…._

Kakashi's mental exhortations didn't reach Iruka.

Iruka decided to read the note out loud. A successful technique which created fear and respect among most students.

Raido already looked frightened.

Genma raised his eyebrows..

_How the – did he DO that?_

"Genma and Raido are losing their skills if they got caught by HIM," Shizune murmured.

Tsunade sighed.

"Drat. This IS a bother…."

"Yo, Genma. What do you think? After this dumb class, how about a nice long evening together at your place? That way, the nightmare named Iruka…. Will be long forgotten…. You know you want to be….."

Iruka stuttered to a stop and turned red with anger and embarrassment.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING WRITING SUCH PERVERTED THINGS IN FRONT OF THE KIDS?"

Genma glared. "I didn't write anything and stop being so abusive."

Raido cringed.

"Detention for the both of you! An hour after class."

Genma jumped up, eyes cold.

"Don't f--- with me, bastard!"

Raido, Ebisu and Ibiki managed to wrestle Genma back into place.

"Iruka…." Tsunade said sweetly. "Let's just leave it for now…"

"But, Hokage-sama!"

"Iruka."

"Ummm… okay… I'll leave it for now…"

Genma relaxed.

As he watched Iruka sit down, Kakashi realized he couldn't just blow the small guy off. Much as he hated the whole presentation thing, he realized in his heart of hearts that it WAS a crucial ability – helpful in warfare and necessary for those time when you wanted to get your point across clearly to stupid Chuunins.

But still….

Iruka took his novel. HIS novel. His NOVEL!

Kakashi didn't think he would ever get over it.

Out of boredom he filled one of the sheets out. As a joke of course.

Everything settled into a relative peace and when the time expired, everyone had to go to the front, to hand in one of their sheets.

Realizing with awful certainty that his time, in many senses, was up, Kakashi sighed and plopped his sheet down, hoping nobody saw what was on the back.

The heroine (Yukie-san) and himself lying together under a tree.

He wondered vaguely whether he'd get himself 'expelled' for it.

_Oh well…._

Time would tell.

Later on that evening, with a sigh (somewhere between happy and tired), Iruka opened his case on his couch and pulled out the thick sheaf of papers. He was excited to see what kind of ideas people had.

Some made him laugh. Some made him nod proudly. Some made him wide-eyed. Some made him frown.

Only one made him come.

Kakashi's page was one of the ones that made him sigh. It was obvious the Jounin was getting back at him for taking his book away and had scribbled nonsense on the page about the literary qualities of the Icha Icha series.

Turning the page over with a shake of the head, Iruka gasped at the sight of a charmingly nude woman and male posing under a tree. The guy had a scar over his left eye with a Sharingan.

Reeling back with a massive nosebleed at the very shocking image, Iruka howled, "KAKASHIIIII!"


	3. Day of Reckoning

I don't own Naruto… which is just as well…

**

* * *

**

Show and Tell

**Day of Reckoning**

Three weeks later, finding their old seats, everybody sat down, with boxes, billboards, bulletins, stacks of papers and various stuff for their presentations.

Iruka's heart swelled as he saw that even Kakashi had brought something.

"Okay," Iruka said. "We'll try to get as many people done as we can today, but I think we'll have to do some tomorrow – so take your time."

He paused, giving Kakashi the evil eye as the Jounin drew out his red book. Kakashi hastily put it away.

Genma and Raido also froze, as did Kurenai and Asumo. Asumo didn't have the perennial cigarette either.

"Okay," Iruka said, peering on his list. "I'm going to pick random people, just to stir up interest…. First person up…. Chouji."

* * *

**To Be Continued - but only if you guys like it!**


	4. Chouji: Hurray for Chubby!

**I don't own Naruto….. I forget the name of whoever owns it…. Some Asian dude….**

**To my reviewers, much thanks!**

**Ting: Apologies in advance for this - Chouji's show and tell. Basically, it boils down to this: University. A big bad word meaning no time to go back and change a prewritten fic, which is what Nanny-chan is all about. In other words, this was set in stone a while ago, and my reading is catching up to me, so I've no time to rewrite any lameness... so apologies in advance. After this, it will get better.**

**Shadow Dragon Boss: Psychoness... hmmm... I don't know if Iruka has anything on Ibiki... read on!**

**AtomBunny: Am continueing as per ordered. Thanks for the encouragement!**

**

* * *

**

**Show and Tell**

**Chouji**

Chouji's board turned out to be a three paneled multi-sized menu.

"……………………………"

Everybody blinked.

Chouji spread out several trays of food.

Everybody leaned forward in anticipation.

Chouji snagged himself a piece of roasted lamb.

"This is the menu of my favorite restaurant, the new Korean Barbeque Buffet Restaurant. Where I eat barbeque buffet."

There was a pause as he ate some more.

"That is so scary…." Sakura whispered to Sasuke. "He eats so much!"

"What's even scarier is the way he eats and talks at the same time," murmured Sasuke, looking creeped out.

"I first went to the restaurant with my father who was congratulating me on surviving the Chuunin Exam but later on, I introduced the place to my team. They really liked it."

As Chouji elaborated on the food quality, good service and recipes, everybody in the room got hungrier and hungrier as Chouji ate more and more.

"So, that's what I've got to show and tell today," Chouji ended, with the last bit of barbequed pork entering his gullet.

Iruka, sucking back his saliva, smiled weakly and the room was filled with scattered applause and a slight grumble.

"Any longer and I would have killed the kid," growled Genma.

Genma hated classrooms and everything to do with it. Watching Chouji eating all that food made him even more morose.

"Now THAT was good torture," Ibiki grunted with a small smile. "I should recruit the kid….."

He made a small note.

Iruka stopped scribbling in his notepad and helped Chouji pack up the bento boxes and the menu.

After looking at his list, he smiled, swallowedhis salivaand chose the next candidate.


	5. Ten Ten: Pointy Objects

I don't own Naruto…. (sniff, sob) Never will….

**

* * *

**

Show and Tell

**TenTen**

"Tenten, how about you?" asked Iruka.

The black-haired kunoichi stood and, hefting up a large box-like thing, walked up front. Opening up the three paneled box, it turned out to be kind of like a medicine cabinet with three sides, except most medicine cabinets don't hold weaponry.

"Hello, my name's Tenten," the girl smiled. "I'm going to show you my weapons collection."

She turned and opened another long box, which Iruka had gently placed in front of the display box.

"First, I've got the standard kunai and shuriken. Also, I've got older versions of them, which my great-great-great-grandfather fought with…."

She held up two battered pieces of weaponry.

Sasuke leaned forward interested.

"I also collect other types – the huge shuriken, which I couldn't bring today – as well as other types of kunai with the added edges."

She opened another panel and took out several weapons.

"I also got a lot of exotic weapons, which I order in or find. This is called a sling-shot, this is called cudgel, this is a nightstick, this is a Malacca cane with an inserted sword…."

Kakashi's eyes drooped but Genma and Raido leaned forward.

"I also got several swords. The epee, the kata, the short sword and the longer swords, the katana…. This was my first katana – it belonged to my great-great-grandmother on my father's side. The ivory handle has white dragons carved into it – a very intricate ancient piece and worth a lot of money."

"I really like gathering weapons and learning about new ones since it teaches you how others fight and how others fought long ago and allows you to think up new ways of attacking people. My favorite weapon which I would most like to own would be a Mauser with a silencer attached. It is a gun that can kill without making a sound."

"Gun?" Naruto asked, puzzled. "What's that?"

"Baka!" yelled Sakura, whacking him upside the head.

Tenten bowed to a heartier applause and carefully packing up her stuff, stowed it away safely before sitting down.

Iruka smiled as he called out the next name.

He could hear Rock Lee saying to himself, "If I don't get picked next, I will never get to date Sakura and she will always call me 'ugly eyebrows'!"


	6. Ibiki: Scarring Shop of Horrors

**I don't own Naruto…. Perhaps that's a good thing…..**

**

* * *

**

Show and Tell

**Ibiki**

"Ibiki-san, how about you?" asked Iruka nervously.

"AUUGGGHHHHH!" Lee collapsed in disappointment, while Gai tried to cheer him up.

The silence was appreciatively heavy as Ibiki rose to walk to the front of the room.

With a loud (calculated) bang, he dumped a wooden chest onto the table. Everybody jumped (except for Kakashi who was daydreaming about the upcoming Icha Icha movie). Iruka began to sweat profusely.

Genma clung to Raido as Iruka opened his box with an air of doom.

"I'm going to be giving a talk on interrogation know-how – what I call, Interrogation 101. Some of you guys have already been through this…."

Genma squeezed his eyes shut.

"Tell me when this is over."

Iruka made a mental note to use Ibiki if ever the senbon-sucking Jounin were to give him trouble in the future.

Hinata looked like she was about to faint, Kakashi jolted out of his fantasy (XXX-rated) when his bench started to vibrate from her shivers.

_WTF! _He thought, staring down at the all too familiar box._ Not in front of the kids!_

"Okay, basically, there are going to be times when you guys are going to need information quickly – perhaps on a mission or something…"

Sasuke nodded. Naruto and Sakura shivered.

"Some easy tools to use – your weaponry, of course, are the first things to grab. And with a few well-placed cuts, most people will fold."

Ibiki scrolled down a large picture of a man – anatomy displayed with round dots to signify important points.

"Pressing on pressure points is also a useful method – if you don't want to draw blood."

Jiraiya, Tsunade, Asumo and Kurenai just shook their heads in exasperation (and secret shock).

_Sick bastard._

Anko nodded and looked like she was enjoying it too.

"Of course, there may be times when you are seriously at a loss. Girls, you can use your makeup tool kit – those eyebrow tweezers can do a lot of damage – especially in these and these areas. Men really succumb to this method. Same thing goes for nail files."

All the girls looked ill. Hinata swayed.

"I will never be able to do my eyebrows again," lamented Ino. "I'll end up like that weird bushy eye brow kid!"

"Eyebrow tweezers? Who would carry such a troublesome thing on a mission?" asked Shikamaru.

"I would!" huffed Ino. She paused. "I would have. You wouldn't understand – your eyebrows are sinfully shaped! You don't have to worry about plucking!"

Ibiki glared.

Everybody stopped muttering.

"This is a picture of a rack. A very medival form of torture in the west. And only possible to do here at the interrogation headquarters here in Konoha. Also, we've got the traditional way of beating people with – these!"

BAM!

He slammed down several bamboo rods.

Everybody jumped.

"Shit! Shit! Shit!" whimpered Genma.

Iruka went very pale.

"Perhaps a demonstration?" asked Ibiki, looking around and enjoying the cowering ninjas – except for Anko, who was licking her lips in expectancy.

Iruka whimpered.

"Oh, no, Ibiki-san! That won't be necessary – look! Why don't you talk a bit more and wrap it up quickly?"

The sick bastard shrugged.

"Right, let's move on." He pulled out several old metal pieces of equipment. "This is for breaking bones…. This is for pulling off skin…. This is for burning….. This is for stretching….."

Hinata fainted.

Kakashi caught her before she hit the floor.

"SHUT THE F--- UP, YOU BASTARD!" screeched Naruto. "YOU'RE MAKING ME FEEL QUEASY!"

Chouji was too busy throwing up into his chip bag to agree.

Ibiki turned to Iruka.

"Perhaps it would be best that I wrapped it up."

Iruka nodded, speechlessly.

Ibiki turned to the class, hands in his great coat pocket.

"I decided on this topic because I feel that people don't know enough about interrogation and how important it is for the life of the shinobi and for the welfare of the village. It's a dirty job – but somebody's got to do it. And at some point, on a mission, information needed quickly – especially when we are at war – can be gotten much easier than you think. Remember, genjutsu is all well and good – but nothing gets to people easier than reality and the reality of pain. Thanks for listening. I hope you won't forget this."

"As if we'd ever be able to forget," Neji sighed.

"I feel ill!" Rock Lee whimpered.

"Don't worry, Lee!" Gai said, smiling. "The nightmare is over."

Hinata's eyes fluttered open to find a concerned Kakashi leaning over her as he cradled her in his arms.

IN HIS ARMS!

_I'm in Kakashi's sensei's ARMS!_

_Aaahhhhhh!_

Hinata fainted again.

Kakashi sighed in exasperation.

_And this girl's supposed to be a ninja?  
_

The class's applause was sparse as most of the Genins were still trying to recover from the shock.

Iruka wiped his brow in relief as he looked over his clipboard.

_The worst is over._

Or was it?


	7. Neji: Check Out Your Destiny

**I don't own Naruto…. Perhaps that's a good thing…..**

**

* * *

**

Show and Tell

**Neji**

"Me! Me! Pick me!" Naruto said, jumping up and down.

"No! It's going to be me!" roared Rock Lee.

"No. It's going to be Neji," Iruka smiled. "Neji?"

Neji rose to his feet silently and made his way down to the front, carefully avoiding Ibiki's wooden chest now placed beside Tenten's weaponry cache.

Pulling out sticky tac, Neji got Iruka to help him raise up a large star chart. Once he finished fastening the poster to the wall and removing his large telescope from its box, Neji turned around and, pulling two file folders out of his case, removed his notes and a stack of handout sheets.

The classroom silently passed the pages along and stared down at the sheet.

"Today, I'm going to talk about my hobby." Neji said. "I enjoy star gazing."

He patted his telescope lovingly.

"It is a combination of astronomy and astrology. Astronomy deals with the scientific side of the heavens – constellations, star movement, creation of planets and other heavenly bodies, cycles and things like that."

He paused.

"Basically, as you can see by my chart, there are many constellations – star groups – so, people of different cultures call them their own special names."

He stopped.

"There was a point in my life when fate was very important to me. I became interested in astrology – a study of the stars to foretell the future. We, of the East, use our years of birth to tell fortunes but Westerners have a system that involves the stars and the dates of the year."

He pointed at the various constellations on the chart.

"Basically, the days of the year are divided between twelve groups called signs, which are represented by a constellation. Aries. Taurus. Gemini. Cancer. Leo. Virgo. Libra. Scorpio. Sagittarius. Capricorn. Aquarius. Pisces. The sheets I handed out to you can help you find out what sign you were born under."

There was a moment of shuffling sheets as shinobi tried to calculate their English birth date within the year.

"So…. Randomly picking somebody…. Sakura…."

Sakura blushed.

"I'm an…… Aries…."

"Hmmmmm…. According to the daily predictions in this yearly horoscope book…. A three star day (out of five, not bad). _Keep your mind open to the advances of an unexpected person. Creativity will increase but beware of physical involvement – you could get hurt badly. Tonight: Get out and about_."

Sakura blushed even redder as she glanced towards Sasuke.

"' Keep your mind open to the advances of an unexpected person', eh?"

_Inner Sakura: It's Sasuke! Love prevails!_

Ino growled.

"Ooookay," Neji said, sweatdropping as he caught sight of the exchange. "How about Raido?"

Raido grinned.

"Virgo."

"Four stars. _A dynamic day for you if you find a fellow analytical Virgo to become closer to. This may not only include mental stimulation but physical pleasure. Keep an eye out for Cancers – they will drive you crazy if you let them. Tonight: Get yourself a date_."

Raido checked the dates for Virgo again.

_Who else was born under the Virgo sign?_

"OKAY!" Raido stood up. "Who's a Virgo?"

_Not me. Not me. Not me_, muttered Kakashi, hoping Raido wouldn't remember the fact that they shared the Virgo sign.

"Geez! This is stupid," grumbled Shikamaru, glaring at the sheet. "Being a Virgo is becoming too troublesome for me."

"C'mon!" Raido whined, receiving no answer. "I want a four star night!"

"Hey! Isn't Kakashi a Virgo?" asked Gai loudly. "He's born in the early September, right?"

Raido's eye landed on the sexy mysteriously masked shinobi.

Kakashi slumped down in his seat, trying to hide behind Kurenai. Hinata looked sympathetic.

"KAKASHIII!"

Genma pulled Raido down and clung to him.

"NOOOOO! RAIDO! Don't leave! I promise I'll give you a FIVE star night!"

"Hey! Quiet down you two!" Iruka bellowed, blushing red.

Izumo and Kotetsu burst out laughing, fit to kill.

"I did NOT want to hear that," Tsunade muttered.

Jiraiya nodded.

Raido and Genma fell silent as Ibiki laid hands on them and pulled them down and squeezed their shoulders in warning.

"Right. One more." Neji said hurriedly. "How about you, Iruka-sensei?"

Iruka blinked.

"Um…. Gemini…."

"Right. Here it says: Three stars. _Beware of people who drain you – learn to say no, especially to inconsolable Cancers – but remember on the other hand to stay supportive. Things could get complicated if you follow your desires and hang out with a Virgo. Tonight: Eat out_."

Iruka blinked.

"……….."

Most of the older ones shook their heads in exasperation.

_Trust Neji to mess with fate_, Tsunade sighed.

"Ehhh?" Naruto muttered. "I so do not understand what's going on!"

_I'm not a Virgo! Waaaa_! (Shizune)

_If I'm the inconsolable Cancer, Neji is going down! The last thing I want to do is have a tender Iruka counseling me_. (Genma)

_Awwww! I have to hang out with THAT Kakashi AND cope with Genma's discontent?_ Iruka sighed. _What a night! Waaaaiiiit! Don't I always eat out for dinner? I'm gypped!_

The silence developed for a minute. Then Neji smiled.

"Hey! Hey! Watching Neji smile is freaky!" Sakura whispered.

"Yeah! It's like seeing Sasuke smile!" Naruto agreed.

"Idiot!"

Rock Lee gave his teammate a thumbs up.

Neji's smile wavered. He looked down at his notes.

"I enjoy the stars now for their beauty – the astronomy side of things remains of interest to me – more now than ever since Naruto taught me an important lesson – that a person can change their fate if they want it hard enough. I like to read these – knowing that life is unpredictable and the stars can't write our blank ticket to the future."

He bowed.

"Thank you."

"Heyyyy! Squawked Naruto. "What about me?"

"You, Naruto-kun," Neji said, rolling his poster up. "Are too unpredictable for the stars to forecast. And I never put faith in this anymore."

_Damn right!_ Agreed Genma and Kakashi.

Hinata sighed. She would have liked to know if there had been a probability for getting close to Naruto.

Then she remembered Neji's words with a sigh.

It was all up to her.

It wasn't a comforting thought.

Iruka tore his thoughts away from his suddenly complicated life and he stared at his clipboard in distraction.

"Thank you Neji," he said. "NEXT UP!" he called as Neji took a seat during a hearty applause.


	8. Ebisu: The Ultimate Cool

**I don't own Naruto…. Perhaps that's a good thing…..**

**

* * *

**

Show and Tell

**Ebisu**

"Ebisu-san! How about you?"

With a smirk and an adjustment of his sunglasses (with his third finger), Ebisu stepped down, two cloth covered towers in his hands – which rattled.

Lifting up the long sheets, Ebisu revealed two spiral racks of various sunglasses – most of them black.

"What the -?"screeched Naruto and Anko.

"When is this idiocy going to end?" muttered Sasuke.

"I know! I haven't learnt anything useful!" Sakura quickly agreed.

_Inner Sakura: But those horoscopes were amazing! Sasuke-kun is mine!_

"Shino – he's got a bigger collection than you!" Kiba howled.

Akamaru 'yip-yipped' in agreement.

_Geez! What an embarrassment,_ Shino thought with a sigh, hiding deep into his high collared coat. _Sometimes I DO hate him……_

"Small things amuse small minds," the genius of the bug clan said coolly.

"Eh?" asked Kiba. "Confucius said that?"

Shino didn't deign to answer.

"Today, I decided to show you my sunglasses collection – they can be an important part of a shinobi's uniform. It makes you look cool and strong and generally unreadable."

"I want one of those!" Naruto said.

"That is SO not cool." Ino grunted.

"Funny how it doesn't really help him," whispered Kurenai to Asumo.

"I think your scar is more sexy than his stupid sunglasses," muttered Genma, hoping a compliment would set things right.

Raido's head was permanently turned to focus on the increasingly uncomfortable Kakashi.

"Masks are cooler," he sighed, dreamy-eyed.

Genma growled.

"I first began wearing them when I was around…. Ohhhh… well, maybe seven years of age…."

He held up a tiny pair of glasses taped and soldered together in various places.

"They are rather banged up because I was rather hard on them when I trained. But you can see here that as I did better in training, my glasses survived longer."

He held up a couple of broken glasses – some of them cracked.

"This pair here is the beginning of my orange lens phase – you can see how it's cracked? Asumo punched me in the face one day. I was – well…. That isn't gentlemanly to talk about in front of such young ears…"

"Hmm… hmm…." Gai rubbed his chin, grinning as he remembered that day.

Asumo rolled his eyes.

"He would bring that up."

"Then I went through the streamlined phase, the blue lens phase…. And a heavy frame phase…."

Ebisu held up various styles of sunglasses.

Tsunade sighed and rested her head on her desk.

Iruka smothered a yawn politely behind his clipboard.

Jiraiya folded his arms and focusing his gaze on a table leg, began to think about the plot line of his most recently begun piece of porn – and how to end it.

Ibiki considered the use of sunglasses during interrogation.

"Aoba, if you know him, wears one of my sunglasses from my thick framed period. He borrowed it and since then hasn't returned them. He's taken to wearing them 24/7 – I think it's time that he changes…."

There was a pause.

Izumo was surreptitiously reading another note from Kotetsu.

"No… I think in retaliation we should put his head in the Jounin toilet bowl and flush him. He's that boring."

Izumo slipped another note back.

"Yeah…. Look at Anko and Genma. I think they might back us up. And let's rope in Kakashi to help us find him."

Kotetsu's reply.

"But what about that horoscope?"

Izumo:

"Damn the horoscope."

Ebisu glanced at his card notes.

"Anyway. To wrap things up. Sunglasses are useful – and also helpful for undercover work. Even my young student Konohamaru wears a form of protective eyewear – a little clunky – but goggles do just the same job. I think all shinobi should have a spare pair."

With that he bowed ever so slightly and everybody woke out of their light doze and clapped in relief.

Iruka blinked several times to banish the glaze that had formed over his eyes and smiled.

'Thank you Ebisu-san. Next up is….."


	9. Asuma: Kids Say No

**WOW! A lot of people are really wanting me to do more of this... well... here goes!**

**Sorry for the wait! Writer's block, lack of inspiration, school, work - all got in the way! Apologies! But it's a longer chapter than most, so enjoy!**

**To my reviewers! Many many thanks! And please review if you haven't (or even if you have!) I write for an audience!**

_CassielDarkmoon: I will be placing an interesting prank ficlet at the end of this fic about IzuKot, GenRai, KakaIru... it will come! _

_Kira-Reen: Yes. Hinata is a very lucky girl... just love her and her newest jutsu! gyah! And Chouji's awesome, of course! Glad you think it's funny!_

_Ano Saa: I try to finish everything I start. Glad you liked Ibiki's presentation. I gutted myself laughing WHILE I was writing it! So fun!_

_Topaz Talyn: Thanks! Nice to see new reviewers! Yes... character in a nutshell... my favorite!_

_Shadow Dragon Boss: Asuma is my nemesis. I never spell it right for some reason... hmmm... well... this chapter will make me or break me! Glad you enjoy! Hope you will continue to enjoy!_

_Ari: Close, but not quite! Hope you enjoy what I've got! (I pre-plan everything!) It just takes awhile to right!_

_Matt and T.K.: hahahahahhaha! you made my day! Very funny! And it's your pleases which really made me move off my butt and write something!_

**

* * *

**

Asuma: Kids Say No

"Me! Me! Me!" Lee was jumping up and down on his bench.

"Go, Lee! You can do it! With the full power of youth!"

"Ummmm….. actually…. It's Asuma."

"YAY! GO GO ASUMA-SENSEI!" Ino squealed.

Lee slumped down dejectedly, wailing how Sakura-chan would definitely NEVER go out on a date with him.

"Baka!" Naruto said, laughing. "Who'd want to go out with fuzzy eyebrows anyway?"

"NAAARRRRUUUUTTTOOOO!" Sakura said, eyes gone huge and round and scarily white. "Stop calling Lee that! It's disrespectful." Her fist pounded down on his head, cracking his face down into the floor boards.

"Shut up, dobe," Sasuke glared. "You're embarrassing me."

Not for the last time, Sasuke wondered why he sat in the front with his team and not back with Kaka-sensei.

He looked around. His sensei was still in a sulk, blue lines of depression all around him. Hinata looked scared.

_

* * *

Maybe not. _

* * *

Meanwhile, Asuma, carrying a small wooden box to the front, cast one long lingering look at Kurenai before continuing up front. 

Iruka sighed.

_

* * *

It's like being in grade school again…. _

* * *

Genma wolf-whistled. Raido didn't remove his eyes from Kakashi. How could Kurenai shine next to the masked Copy Nin? Although… it would be nice if she weren't sitting there at all… when she shifted, his view was blocked…. _

* * *

Damn her. _

_Was she doing it on purpose?_

* * *

He didn't see Genma giving her a thumbs up behind her back. 

Ibiki hit his forehead.

_

* * *

What a pack of idiots. _

* * *

Asuma set his smaller box on the table and opened it up without further ado. Iruka, who had moved aside, frowned as he pulled out a cigarette dramatically and lit it in class. He inhaled and then blew out a long stream of grayish smoke toward the classroom desks. 

Team 7 died instantly from smoke inhalation and lung cancer. Shikamaru's team weathered it well. Being around Asuma-sensei had made them impervious – almost immunized – to all sorts of cigarette pollution.

It certainly didn't shut up Ino's cheering.

"Today I want to talk with class about my first cigarette."

"Oh no."

Iruka hit his forehead with his clipboard.

"Attaboy!"

Genma hollered.

_

* * *

Anything to piss Iruka off. _

* * *

Asuma ignored everybody and winked at Kurenai. He held up a small crumpled packet and after showing everybody, laid it lovingly down. 

"That was my first cigarette packet. I was given it by Genma who was just getting out of his cigarette phase and starting his 'more healthy' phase of chewing on picks and senbons…"

Everybody turned and glared at Genma, who sniffed. Especially Raido.

_

* * *

Damn them all. Damn Raido. _

* * *

"Anyway, the first pull I had, I nearly died. But after that, I got used to it – and I realized I looked cool." 

**Everybody: You've got to be kidding me….**

"Of course," Asuma said, shutting his eyes in contentment as he inhaled. "I moved on to better things than Genma's crap."

Genma raised an eyebrow.

Asuma carefully set up about a dozen different cigarette boxes up on top of the box.

"I moved on from the regular to the filtered to the unfiltered to the herbal stuff to the more experimental weed…"

Iruka's face was horrified. Shizune was horrified. So was Ebisu.

Tsunade, Jiraiya, Ibiki, Genma, Raido, Kotetsu and Izumo were choking down giggles.

_

* * *

Weed! Hee hee hee hee! _

* * *

Kakashi found some comfort in the horror of Iruka. _

* * *

Serve him right, pansy Chuunin! _

* * *

Then he remembered his own presentation and cheered up. _

* * *

Gyah hahahaha! _

* * *

The Genins found their voice. 

Naruto: I don't understand!

Sakura: He better not be saying what I think he's saying? Is Tsunade-sama laughing?

Sasuke: ……………. Dobe……………

Ino: Whhhaaaatttt the hell?

Chouji: Hmmmm…. Yum… chompchompchomp… seems like they're giving him a lot of attention chompchompchomp Asuma-sensei's really cool, eh?

Shikamaru: This is going to be really troublesome….

Shino: A wise man once said –

Kiba: Screw the wise man! We need some of that, eh, Akamaru!

Shino: Damn right you do…. Relax, man….

Kiba: Eh?

Shino: Why do you think Shikamaru's so relaxed?

Kiba: blinks ehhhh….

Hinata: O-oh… d-d-d-dear! K-kurenai-sensei!

Neji: ………………

Lee: That's what happens in the springtime of youth!

Gai: Damn right, Lee! Sometimes it's sweet, and sometimes it's sour! Asuma-sensei had alot of sour...

Neji:…………………..

Tenten: (sigh) This is nuts….

Kurenai merely rolled her eyes.

* * *

"Now," Asuma said, "I know what you're thinking! You're thinking – I want to do that too!" 

"Actually, no –" Iruka said, firmly.

"I was thinking that?" asked Naruto.

"Dobe! It's rhetorical!"

"But – I should warn you!" Asuma said. "First of all. It's for adults only!"

"WWWWHHHAAATTTTT!" (Kiba)

"Phew!" (Iruka)

"Who cares?" (Naruto)

"………." (Sasuke, Neji, Shino)

"And secondly, it's dangerous. It says so on the box!"

"Cool!" (Kiba)

"Damn right!" (Shizune)

"How troublesome!" (Shikamaru)

"I want a light, seriously…." (Ibiki)

"And thirdly, it's my trademark, so don't even start to think about taking my image!"

**Everybody: ………………………….. what?...**

"After all, Ebisu has his glasses, Genma, his senbon, Iruka, his scar, Gai, his hair cut, Tsunade – her – um – well, anyway, Jiraiya his hair and dress and clogs and stuff…. Kurenai has her beauty and Ibiki his scars and Kakashi his mask – I need a trademark and so I smoke!"

Asuma smiles and winks at Kurenai. Kurenai sweatdrops.

**Everybody: ………………………… What?...**

Ebisu: I see his strategy! Well, he's not going to outdo me in coolness!

Gai: My hair is cool! I'm in the spring time of youth!

Lee: You go, Gai-sensei!

Tsunade: What. Was. He. Saying? (In a dangerous voice).

Shizune: Now, now, I'm sure he meant well…

Genma glared at Asuma while consoling Raido. "You have a trademark, too, Raido!"

"Y-y-yeee-es… b-b-but it's ta-ta-taken!"

"Now, now, your scar is very different from Iruka's and Kakashi's. Very unique."

"Are you sure?"

"Absolutely!"

_(loving ensues)_

Iruka jumped on the two _hugging_ shinobi.

"Not in front of the kids, you guys! Idiots! Get yourself a room!"

Asuma's presentation ended in a melee as Genma tried to knock Iruka-sensei out, but was held back by Ibiki, Izumo, Anko. Raido was held back by Kakashi, Kotetsu and Shizune.

But then, Raido started to ogle Kakashi, who let him go. Genma then got angry at Kakashi and more fighting ensued.

By the time Tsunade and Jiraiya stepped in (two seconds later), all the Genins were in an uproar and the class room was wrecked.

They decided to adjourn the presentations until the next day.

* * *

_Yep... havoc and chaos..._

_Who do you want to present next? Be Iruka for a moment and tell me? I'll pick the one which "speaks" to me the most..._

_(does not include the bad guys of Naruto)_


	10. Shino: Wise Man

**I don't own NARUTO!**

**Thank goodness!**

**READ AND REVIEW! Tell me what you think!**

**THANK YOU TO ALL WHO HAVE REVIEWED! WHO'VE BEEN CHECKING FAITHFULLY TO SEE IF I UPDATED! WHO LAUGHED! WHO READ IT! **

**ENJOY!**

**

* * *

**

Show and Tell

**Shino: Wise Man**

The next morning the entire class room arrived tired and disgruntled – and a few of them – like Iruka, Genma, Raido, Jiraiya and Anko were nursing bruises, bone cracks and aching heads.

Not that the Genin were in any better states.

"Ohhhh…. Never again," groaned Chouji.

"If you trained more and got more fit," Ino snarked. "This wouldn't be happening."

"Ehhh???"

"Never mind, never mind," the white blonde hastily amended.

"Even for people who don't want to be in such troublesome activities…" Shikamaru sighed, straightening a bandage over a scratch he got from Sakura's nails. "No choice… damn…"

"Eh heh heh!!!" Naruto yelled, as he entered the room. "GOOD MORNING!"

"Who the hell does he think he is?" grumbled Tsunade, trying to get up.

"Now, now…" Shizune said, hastily pulling out a cup of Valerian-spiked tea. "Here…"

"Really, old woman." Jiraiya said. "You need to relax… Get what I mean?"

Tsunade settled for a glare.

Naruto however – as per usual – didn't know when to shut up.

"I can hardly wait!!!" He smiled in Sakura's direction. "I hope it will be my turn today!"

"YOSH!!! We can run to the sun together!!!" Lee crowed, giving a thumbs up toward Naruto.

"Well…" Naruto mumbled. "I wasn't asking you."

"Shut. The. Kid. Up…" growled Genma, nursing a huge headache (from stress: Raidou wouldn't do anything the night before). "Or else…"

"Where's Kakashi?" asked Raidou, turning around to look toward the far back corner.

Ibiki sighed.

"Genma, relax. Raidou. Sorry. But I don't think he'll be showing up for a long while…"

"But –"

"Trust me on this…"

When Akamaru came into the classroom with Kiba, yipping at the top of his doggie lungs, he nearly met his maker. Several kunai came flying in their direction accompanied by "Shut up the damn dog, or he's dead!"

"Maa, maa! You guys are too tense!"

"They're just not as old as they used to be," Naruto laughed. "Look at the old lady!!!"

Kiba and Akamaru, noticing the sudden death glares zoning in on him and Naruto, edged away.

"Um. Well… you don't have to put it QUITE like that!"

Kakashi came in last.

That he came at all was a surprise.

But then they saw a purple book in his hand.

It was the newest Icha Icha.

Tsunade glared at Jiraiya.

Jiraiya shrugged.

"Whatever works, right?"

Iruka sighed.

Looking down at his clipboard, he wondered what to do next. He had kind of hoped for Genma or Kakashi, but that would raise tempers. No. One of the Genin would do it.

_

* * *

But which one? _

* * *

Naruto would be too loud for this early in the morning. 

Sasuke, too depressing.

Lee, too annoying.

Neji had already had his turn.

Kiba was too hyper.

_

* * *

Shino. _

* * *

"Okay… Today, we're going to start with Shino!" 

"WWWWHHHHHHAAAAATTTTT!!!!" screeched Naruto.

BAM! Sakura's fist found its mark in the center of the blonde's head.

Kiba and Akamaru looked disappointed.

Lee looked suicidal.

"Don't worry Lee!" Gai said encouragingly. "The springtime of youth is filled with tests of endurance – take each opportunity to learn the importance of patience! Now, let's go and run!"

"Yosh! I will, Gai-sensei! You're so wise, Gai-sensei! I can only hope to shine for you one day!!!"

-cheesy music-

**Everybody: "……………………………………….."**

* * *

While everybody was trying to get back down to earth, Shino walked up front to take out of his bag a huge glass box which comprised of different compartments. 

Full of bugs.

"GO! GO! SHINO!!!" whooped Kiba. "KICK ASS!"

"Sh-sh-shino-kun! I-I-I hope you d-d-d-do well…." Whispered Hinata (and only heard by Shino's bug scout and Kakashi, who was still sitting next to her).

Kotetsu sighed.

_

* * *

Bugs… what next…. _

* * *

He slapped away a fly and killed it. _

* * *

Stupid creatures. _

* * *

Shino frowned. 

"Uh-oh…" Kiba sighed.

"Eeeep!" Hinata whimpered.

"What?" asked Kakashi, already bored of the whole situation. "Naruto looked at you?"

"Hagane-san just killed an insect… Shino-kun is angry…"

"Oh…. I didn't know. He just looked like he had constipation or something…"

_

* * *

Although his chakra DID flare… _

* * *

"As a great man once said, 'Great ability develops and reveals itself increasingly with every new assignment' (1) I think that these creatures who are often underestimated are as capable of destruction as any other summoning." 

"GYAAAHHH! Bugs!!!" Squealed Ino.

"Crreeeepppyy!" shuddered Sakura.

"You're so cool, show'em!" crowed Kiba.

"Kill me." Genma groaned. "Now."

He stopped when he noticed Raido trying to climb into his lap, clinging to him with large, watery, chibi-brown eyes.

"S-s-s-scared... pretend you're hugging me... I'll lose face in front of the deathly duo..."

_Or not... _Genma enjoyed Raido's warmth, hoping the masked Jounin wouldn't pop into his partner's brain.

"It is also important to realize that the weak have the power to overcome the strong. With these friends of mine, I am not only able to do battle, but also search -"

"Those are his friends?" Sakura asked. "How... sad..."

"Pathetic, yes," Ino agreed.

"Look who's talking..."

"Shut up, big forehead girl!"

Shino's shade's glinted. Everyone shut up immediately.

"At any rate, there are MANY different kind of insects in the world. Of course, I won't elaborate on my own jutsus... but instead, hope to educate you and build within my audience a healthy respect for these little creatures. For starters, this bikochou is a very interesting animal. When it is born, it will smell one smell and will search for that smell all its life - and once finding it, will never leave."

"THAT'S SO COOL!" Lee shook his head in amazement. "I never fail to appreciate the knowledge of my fellow nins."

"Cool..." Naruto rolled his eyes. "Sounds dumb to me."

"Well... who knows," Sasuke glared at his embarassing teammate. "It might prove to be useful in the future."

**Everybody else sweatdropped.**

**... RRRRIIIIGGGGHHHTTTT...**

The girls didn't know what to say.

Raido clung even tighter to Genma.

Iruka, turning around in his seat, gave the pair his famous "You're-so-dead" LOOK - which immediately made Anko fall in love. Ibiki made a mental note to recruit the Chuunin for hard case interrogation. Genma and Raido seperated faster than you could say "kunai" - and Iruka smiled.

Shino had moved over to the "common fly", the "cockroach" and various other domestic and wild insects.

By the time all the women in the class were sufficiently creeped out, Shino gave a short speech (filled with appropriate quotes) on the importance of the small.

"The Aburame Clan isn't as reknown as the Uchiha or the Hyuuga - but like the small but powerful creatures we have allied with, so too, our clan will prove it's might and will in order to protect those dear to their hearts."

Everybody clapped politely.

Raido relaxed (as did half the class).

Kakashi surreptitiously quashed a fly and earned a glare from Shino (and Kurenai).

_

* * *

That was... uneventful... but perfect. Now everybody's relaxed... _

* * *

Iruka sighed as he caught sight of a dozy Izumo. _

* * *

Maybe too relaxed. Perhaps... _

_We need somebody interesting next..._

* * *

"It better be me!" yelled Naruto. "I've got the COOLEST PRESENTATION!" 

**Everybody else: Yeah. Right.**

"I think my presentation is the best - but... I'm cheering you on!" Lee chinged his teeth at the short Genin.

Naruto sweatdropped.

"I wasn't asking you..."

"Well... you better not be expecting my support," Sasuke muttered. "Stupid."

"WHAT DID YOU SAY!"

"Why... do... I have to HEAR THIS SO EARLY IN THE MORNING!!!!" Tsunade screamed Naruto down.

Jiraiya winced.

_

* * *

Iruka-sensei... you better be willing to pay... Sure I've done some questionable things in the past... but I don't deserve this... _

* * *

Kakashi was reading Asuma's notes to Kurenai - ignoring Raido's looks (which were earning jealous glares from Genma). 

Ibiki had started to whisper with Anko about insect torture.

Izumo and Kotetsu were busy tacking Neji's ponytail to their desk...

Iruka sighed.

_

* * *

I better come up with something quick. If I'm not careful... things are gonna blow... _

_But who to pick?_

* * *

**WHO TO PICK INDEED! **

**YOU DECIDE!!!!**

**1. must be loud**

**2. cannot be Kakashi**

**-------**

List of people who still have a turn:

Gai

Lee

Jiraiya

Tsunade

Shizune

Kurenai

Naruto

Sakura

Sasuke

Hinata

Kiba

Izumo

Kotetsu

Anko

Shikamaru

Ino


End file.
